Beach Too Sandy, Water Too Wet

Does your eggplant come with skin?

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I wouldn't ask for underwear if I didn't need the underwear.

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A belly full of white dog turds.

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“Treat, don’t trick, your teeth this month and go to shopremi.com/beach and use code BEACH at checkout for 50% off with Remi Club.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

I hate when they put wang in my food.

Follow Michelle on Instagram at @michcoll or @The Michelle Collins Show

We're going on tour! Buy tickets at https://www.beachtoosandy.com/

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Head to talkiatry.com/beach to complete the short assessment and get matched with an in‐network psychiatrist in just a few minutes.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A stained crotch is not the experience we wanted for you.

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Visit progressive.com after this episode to see if you could save.
See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.