Dating again in midlife can stir up a mix of curiosity, hope, and very real hesitation. After divorce, it’s not just about meeting someone new, it’s about trusting your instincts and believing that love can feel different this time. Susan Guthrie welcomes back one of Divorce & Beyond’s most trusted and favorite guests, Bela Gandhi, for an honest, encouraging conversation about what it truly takes to move from fear to confidence when dating again in midlife.
Known as America’s go-to dating coach and beloved by the Divorce & Beyond community, Bela brings warmth, optimism, and refreshingly practical wisdom to a chapter that often feels overwhelming. Together, Susan and Bela unpack why midlife dating can actually be better than ever, how to stop repeating old patterns that no longer serve you, and what smart, intentional dating looks like when you’re choosing differently and more consciously this time around.
What You’ll Learn
Why fear around dating after divorce is normal
How those “rollercoaster butterflies” are usually a sign of anxiety, not chemistry, and how to recognize calm as a healthier sign of compatibility
How dating today offers more options, visibility, and agency than ever before, especially for midlife daters
Why confidence in dating comes from having a clear plan, not luck, timing, or instant sparks
How slowing down and allowing connection to develop over time leads to better long-term outcomes
About the Guest
Bela Gandhi is a dating/relationship expert, TEDx speaker, founder of Smart Dating AcademyÒ and has been featured on most national/local media outlets including Good Morning America, Steve Harvey, the Today Show, Kelly Clarkson, Access, ABC, NBC, Fox, and more.
Bela realized her gift for love when she was in college and started matchmaking and coaching her friends – watching them sail on to relationship bliss and marriage. Using her own system, Bela found her own amazing husband of over 20 years, and in 2009, founded Smart Dating AcademyÒ. Smart Dating Academy teaches singles all over the globe the Smart DatingÒ four phase system – 1) Preparing to Date, 2) Dating, 3) Exclusivity and 4) Happily Ever After. They specialize in VIP 1:1 coaching, and with clients that have followed their system, they’ve had ‘zero divorces.’ They help singles to ‘fix their pickers’ because their coaches are deep in the weeds with clients, helping read profiles, message, and rate each date after it happens – she makes dating fun, easy and successful!
Before starting Smart Dating Academy, Bela earned dual degrees in Finance and German from the University of Illinois in Urbana/Champaign. Bela worked in mergers and acquisitions for Arthur Andersen in Chicago for a year before joining her family's chemicals manufacturing company (called CCC), where she divided her time between Chicago and Europe helping to expand the business. When they sold the business to Fortune 500 company Akzo Nobel, she was asked to remain its leader and became Akzo Nobel Non-Stick Coating’s Global Vice President of Housewares. While climbing the corporate ladder, she realized it was time to unveil her system to the world, and it was her best decision ever.
Bela lives in Lincoln Park with her husband Andy and 2 children, Jaden and Max, and is going to be an empty nester next year!
Connect with Bela Gandhi
Website: http://smartdatingacademy.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/smartdatingacademy
Podcast: https://www.smartdatingacademy.com/podcast
The Midlife Dating Mindset Reset Guide Download
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Meet Our Host
Susan E. Guthrie®, Esq. is one of the nation’s leading family law and mediation experts, with more than 35 years of experience helping individuals and families navigate divorce and conflict with clarity and compassion. She is the Immediate Past Chair of the American Bar Association Section of Dispute Resolution, a best-selling author, and a sought-after speaker, trainer, and practice-building consultant.
Susan recently appeared as the featured expert on The Oprah Podcast, where she shared her insights on gray divorce and the changing landscape of relationships. Her expertise has also been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Forbes, The Washington Post, NewsNation, and NBC’s Chicago Today, among many others.
As the creator and host of the award-winning Divorce & Beyond® Podcast, ranked in the top 1% of all podcasts worldwide with more than 3.4 million downloads, Susan brings together top experts and powerful personal stories to help listeners move through divorce and beyond with confidence, insight, and hope.
Learn more about Susan and her work at susaneguthrie.com.
Divorce & Beyond is a Top 1% Overall and Top 100 Self-Help podcast designed to help you with all you need to know to navigate your divorce journey and most importantly, to thrive in your beautiful beyond!
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