This episode starts with something small. One of those mornings where I woke up feeling flat. Not dramatic, not heavy, just… empty. I’d been working a lot, taking steps, doing things that matter. But that morning, the battery felt low.
I wanted to get out of the house, so I got dressed, shoes on, coat on, ready to leave. And then I stood at the door and realised I hadn’t decided where I was going. Coat off. Shoes off. Then gym clothes on. Sports drink made. Gym on a Sunday? Probably crowded. And suddenly I was standing in the hallway, shoes in my hand, wanting to go out, but not going anywhere.
That moment made something clear to me. This wasn’t about motivation or discipline. It was something else. And that’s what this episode is really about.
Because these moments often look like laziness or lack of interest, but most of the time they’re overwhelm in disguise. You want to move, but you haven’t decided where yet. So every option stays open. And when everything stays open, nothing actually happens. You start negotiating with yourself. A walk, maybe. Coffee, maybe. Somewhere, maybe. Each option almost works, none of them really land. And the longer you think, the harder choosing becomes.
I talk about how this shows up in different ways. Sometimes you’re low on energy and choosing feels heavy, so postponing feels easier. Other times you actually have energy, ideas, curiosity, momentum, but you’re too open. Different feeling, same result. You stay where you are.
I also reflect on how well-meant advice like “just do what feels right” can actually make things harder when you’re already stuck. Because suddenly you’re not just choosing an activity, you’re trying to choose the right feeling. And in that state, thinking through options doesn’t help. It pulls me straight into overthinking. Time passes. And later, the regret isn’t about what I did or didn’t do, it’s about how long I stayed stuck trying to decide.
The key insight in this episode is simple but important: the problem isn’t that you can’t decide, it’s that you’re letting the moment decide. And moments aren’t good at carrying responsibility. They create pressure. Hesitation turns into overthinking. Overthinking turns into overwhelm. Time drains away. And something else happens too, self-trust takes a small hit. Not because you made the wrong choice, but because you keep telling yourself you’ll do something and then you don’t.
I share a small, practical experiment that works for me. I picked one recurring moment in my week and used it to decide in advance. For me, that’s Monday afternoon. I send a few simple messages, asking people if they want to grab coffee, go for a walk, or have lunch sometime. I make plans for the next one or two weeks and put them in my calendar. That way, when the day comes, no matter how I feel, I don’t have to negotiate with myself anymore. I already chose.
I end the episode with this reminder: most of the time, you don’t regret going. You regret the hours you lost standing in the hallway, shoes in your hand, negotiating with yourself. When you do catch yourself hesitating, even after you planned something, do the thing you originally chose and notice how it feels afterwards. Something almost always shifts, because you chose movement over stuckness.
If this episode made you think of someone, feel free to share it with them and let them know what part made you think of them. And if you feel like sharing your thoughts with me, you can always leave a comment. I really do love hearing from you.
I’m Luca, and I look forward to our next conversation.
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