LATE BLOOMERS

Are you tired all the time, even when it feels like you haven’t done much? This week, Rich and Rox unpack ten everyday things that can drain their neurodivergent batteries: masking, disrupted sleep, sensory overload, basic self-care, hyperfocus, social hangovers and the effort of feeling everything so intensely. Rich reflects on the exhaustion of pretending all day at the bank and why losing his routine has made looking after himself harder; Rox explains why everyday tasks rarely feel automatic, her brain switches on the moment she wakes up and an exciting plan can become an exhausting commitment.
It’s really about the effort other people don’t see, recognising when you’re running on empty and giving yourself permission to rest. Along the way, there’s a dispute over bedroom boundaries, an unexpectedly deep dive into golf balls and a shared decision that the next activity should probably be a nap.
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Your partner turns up late to a date. Red flag, or ADHD? They correct every tiny detail in your stories. Red flag, or autism? This week on LATE BLOOMERS, Rich and Rox play Red Flag or Neurodivergent, working through ten dating behaviours the internet loves to call toxic and asking what's really going on underneath.
Most of it comes straight from their own relationship. Rox has forgotten their anniversary more than once (one year she apologised with a song on TikTok) and used to go eight hours without a text during songwriting sessions. Rich shuts down mid-argument, corrects her stories because "I don't need to be right, I just need it to be right", and admits he's disgustingly neutral when she's venting about someone who's upset her. They also get honest about a recent wobble where Rox felt Rich didn't fancy her anymore, and how one awkward conversation fixed it.
The takeaway: neurodivergence explains a lot, but it doesn't excuse everything. A partner who listens, talks and adapts is the real green flag.
Get our book THE CHERRY TREE THEORY
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Listen to the audiobook
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This week on LATE BLOOMERS, Rich and Rox sit the Great Adulting Test: 20 questions pulled from Reddit and the internet about what actually makes someone a functional adult, with producer Max keeping score.
Rox lost her licence in her 20s for running red lights, thinks "important mail" means her skincare deliveries, and has 350 unread WhatsApp chats. Rich has never paid a bill late in his life but will not do small talk with strangers, full stop. Neither of them knows their bank balance within £100, and nobody can agree who actually booked the dentist.
It's ADHD vs autism at its most petty, and one of them wins comfortably. Keep score at home and let us know in the comments.
Get our book THE CHERRY TREE THEORY
http://linktr.ee/cherry.tree.theory
Listen to the audiobook
https://linktr.ee/CHERRY.TREE.AUDIOBOOK
20% off Loop Earplugs: https://www.loopearplugs.com/adhdlove

Shame doesn’t say you did something bad. It says you are bad—and that belief can quietly ruin your whole life. This week, Rich and Rox confront ten things they’ve struggled to forgive themselves for, including addiction, debt, divorce, executive dysfunction, parenting mistakes and feeling like they’d wasted their lives.
Rich shares the darkest consequences of his gambling addiction, while Rox opens up about the shame of being unable to manage basic tasks and believing she couldn’t trust herself. It’s raw, occasionally brutal and somehow still funny—because your worst mistake doesn’t have to become your entire identity.
20% off Loop Earplugs: ⁠https://www.loopearplugs.com/adhdlove
CHAPTERS
00:00 The difference between shame and guilt
01:38 “I can’t let anybody see how I live”
03:03 “What’s that smell?”
05:03 “My mistakes are unforgivable”
05:50 Rich’s gambling addiction
07:30 Why everyone needs a redemption story
08:13 “I’ve wasted my life”
11:02 “I’ve failed in relationships”
14:03 “I’m a terrible friend”
16:06 Loop Earplugs
17:08 “Why don’t I want to be touched?”
18:40 “I can’t trust myself”
21:27 Being an emotionally unavailable father
23:23 “I’m scared I’m a bad parent”
26:13 Shame about autistic sensitivities
27:41 Final thoughts

You might take the mask off after work—but are you actually taking it off at home? This week, Rich and Rox expose ten ways ADHD and autistic people can still perform around the people they trust most, from saying “I’m fine” and agreeing to plans you secretly dread to hiding sensory overwhelm, exhaustion and chaos.
They talk fake facial expressions, panic-cleaning, apologising for moods that have nothing to do with you and why “I’ll do it later” often means something completely different. It turns out feeling safe enough to be honest can involve more awkward conversations—and fewer forced cuddles.
20% off Loop Earplugs: ⁠https://www.loopearplugs.com/adhdlove