Psychology, Actually

Why do some fears disappear whilst others seem to stay with us for years? Why can one bad experience shape the way we think, feel and behave long after the danger has passed? And why do humans keep expecting the worst, even when things are actually okay?
In this episode of Psychology, Actually, I’m joined by Dr Martyn Quigley, Senior Lecturer in Psychology at Swansea University, to explore the fascinating psychology of extinction learning, phobias, anxiety, exposure therapy, conditioning and habit change.
We discuss why fear responses develop, why they can be so difficult to shift, and how our brains learn safety through experience. Along the way we also explore the surprising psychology behind ghosting, positive reinforcement, expectancy violations and why noticing when things go right might be one of the most powerful psychological tools we have.
Whether you're interested in anxiety, phobias, psychology, mental health, behaviour change, exposure therapy or simply understanding why humans think and act the way they do, this episode is packed with practical insights.
Highlights
00:00 Why fears can last for years00:57 Meet Dr Martyn Quigley01:53 What is extinction learning?02:55 The psychology of ghosting05:29 Breaking habits through extinction learning07:10 Parenting, behaviour and reinforcement07:50 Habituation explained11:18 Why some sounds drive us mad12:01 Extinction learning vs errorless learning14:33 Positive reinforcement at home18:12 Why we notice complaints more than praise21:53 From ghosting to phobias22:53 What actually is a phobia?24:52 The Little Albert experiment25:56 How extinction learning helps treat phobias27:01 Why fear can come back29:01 Dogs, anxiety and context-dependent learning30:58 Exposure therapy and systematic desensitisation35:19 Virtual reality treatments for phobias37:43 Shark phobias and everyday anxiety39:54 Expectancy violations and anxiety41:46 Learning to notice when things go right44:12 Future psychology topics and closing reflections
Interested in working in research? I think you'll love this episode with my guest Jess: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/fb1c8b18-620d-474e-bcc8-d7224e4b449f/
Links:
📲 Connect with Dr Martyn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-martyn-quigley-a6381936/
🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes and / or exclusive weekly content head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join
📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0
📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97
💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/membership
🖥️ Check out my short courses for aspiring psychologists and mental health professionals here: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/online-courses
Ask Marianne your most pressing psychology career question and she will send you a FREE bespoke reply! Grab your free psychology success guide here and fill in the most pressing concern box: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk (scroll to the bottom of the page)
✍️ Get your FREE Supervision Shaping Tool now: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/free-resources
📱Connect socially with Marianne and check out ways to work with her, including the Aspiring Psychologist Book, Clinical Psychologist book and The Aspiring Psychologist Membership on her Link tree: https://linktr.ee/drmariannetrent
💬 To join my free Facebook group and discuss your thoughts on this episode and more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiringpsychologistcommunity
Like, Comment, Subscribe & get involved:
If you enjoy the podcast, please do subscribe and rate and review episodes.
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#aspiringpsychologist #dclinpsy #psychology #assistantpsychologist #psychologycareers #podcast #psychologypodcast #clinicalpsychologist #mentalhealth #traineeclinicalpsychologist #clinicalpsychology #drmariannetrent #mentalhealthprofessional #gettingqualified #mentalhealthprofessionals #traineepwp #mdt #qualifiedpsychologist #traineepsychologist #aspiringpsychologists #wellbeing
Mentioned in this episode:
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336

What happens when you begin recognising old relational patterns… and start looking back at past relationships differently?
In this week’s Inner Work episode, I reflect on grief, hindsight, growth, emotional memory and the complicated feelings that can emerge when we realise we might make very different choices now than we once did.
We explore:
changing values and priorities
relational growth and self-reflection
compassion for former versions of ourselves
grief for what could have been
emotional reactions to photos, memories and relationships from the past
healing old emotional wounds
how therapy can help memories feel less emotionally jagged

This is a reflective, compassionate episode about growth, hindsight and learning to hold both sadness and fondness at the same time.
My Inner Work series is a space to pause and think more deeply about yourself. I explore where those roles come from… and whether they’re still serving you now.
These videos were previously members only but I have decided to share them with you so thanks for being here.
💡 Want to support the channel? Like, comment, and share this video!
🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join
📩 Business & Collaboration Enquiries
✉️ Email: Info@GoodThinkingPsychology.co.uk
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⚠️ Disclaimer This content is for informational and educational purposes only. It does not constitute medical, psychological, or professional advice. Any actions taken based on this content are at your own risk. © Dr Marianne Trent
#psychologypodcast
Mentioned in this episode:
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336

Why do we keep repeating relationship patterns that no longer serve us?
In this episode of Psychology, Actually, Dr Marianne Trent is joined by fellow Clinical Psychologist Dr Kate Sherratt to explore attachment, relational patterns, dating psychology, burnout, self-esteem and why our earliest relationships can quietly shape the way we navigate adult life.From people-pleasing and emotional shutdown… to burnout at work, dating “catnip”, anxious attachment and struggling to ask for needs to be met - this conversation explores the hidden relational patterns that often sit underneath our everyday struggles.
⏱️ Timestamps
00:00 Why relationship problems often begin long before dating
01:14 What are relational patterns?
02:46 Burnout and old emotional patterns
05:30 Formulation and understanding your “user manual”
07:09 Protector patterns and emotional self-reliance
09:14 Supervision, attachment and criticism sensitivity
11:10 Why praise sometimes doesn’t go in
14:49 Building healthier self-esteem
16:30 Dating, consistency and emotional safety
17:25 Attachment theory and dating patterns
20:04 Dating “icks”, red flags and emotional catnip
22:29 Love bombing and unhealthy intensity
23:34 People-pleasing in relationships
26:27 What does a healthy relationship actually look like?
28:46 Deal breakers, values and emotional safety
30:51 Why emotional catnip can keep you stuck
33:36 Inner Work and deeper reflections

Links:
📲 Connect with Dr Kate Sherratt here: https://www.instagram.com/drkate.psychologist https://www.drkatesherratt.com
🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes and / or exclusive weekly content head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join
📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0
📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97
💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/membership
🖥️ Check out my short courses for aspiring psychologists and mental health professionals here: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/online-courses
Ask Marianne your most pressing psychology career question and she will send you a FREE bespoke reply! Grab your free psychology success guide here and fill in the most pressing concern box: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk (scroll to the bottom of the page)
✍️ Get your FREE Supervision Shaping Tool now: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/free-resources
📱Connect socially with Marianne and check out ways to work with her, including the Aspiring Psychologist Book, Clinical Psychologist book and The Aspiring Psychologist Membership on her Link tree: https://linktr.ee/drmariannetrent
💬 To join my free Facebook group and discuss your thoughts on this episode and more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiringpsychologistcommunity
Like, Comment, Subscribe & get involved:
If you enjoy the podcast, please do subscribe and rate and review episodes.
Hashtags:
#datingpsychology #attachmentstyles #attachment #relationalpatterns
Mentioned in this episode:
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336

What if the problem isn’t that you’re lazy… but that modern life is designed to overwhelm you?
In this episode of Psychology, Actually, Dr Marianne Trent is joined by author Lily Silverton to explore the psychology of procrastination, overwhelm, attention, comparison and why so many people struggle to prioritise what actually matters.If you constantly feel behind, overstimulated or exhausted by competing demands, this conversation may really resonate.
⏱️ Timestamps
00:00 Netflix says sleep is the competition
01:07 Why prioritising matters psychologically
01:59 A wealth of information creates a poverty of attention
03:10 Even the Romans felt overwhelmed
04:32 Why modern companies compete for your focus
05:55 The psychology of procrastination
08:30 Emotional avoidance and fear of failure
09:59 Why “future you” won’t magically change
11:47 Breaking tasks down and body doubling
15:02 The Eisenhower Matrix explained
17:22 Why small tasks feel addictive
18:03 Other people’s urgency isn’t always yours
19:20 Boundaries, parenting and workload pressure
22:10 Comparison, social media and self-worth
24:23 When social media becomes self-harm
25:21 “Do you actually want their whole life?”
28:13 Resetting your algorithm and protecting wellbeing
29:28 The Wellbeing Cups exercise
31:01 Why Lily wrote Prioritise This
33:33 Inner Work and deeper reflections

Links:
📚 Check out Lily's Book, Prioritise This: https://amzn.to/432A2Su
📲 Follow Lily on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/lily_silverton/
🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes and / or exclusive weekly content head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join
📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0
📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97
💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/membership
🖥️ Check out my short courses for aspiring psychologists and mental health professionals here: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/online-courses
Ask Marianne your most pressing psychology career question and she will send you a FREE bespoke reply! Grab your free psychology success guide here and fill in the most pressing concern box: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk (scroll to the bottom of the page)
✍️ Get your FREE Supervision Shaping Tool now: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/free-resources
📱Connect socially with Marianne and check out ways to work with her, including the Aspiring Psychologist Book, Clinical Psychologist book and The Aspiring Psychologist Membership on her Link tree: https://linktr.ee/drmariannetrent
💬 To join my free Facebook group and discuss your thoughts on this episode and more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiringpsychologistcommunity
Like, Comment, Subscribe & get involved:
If you enjoy the podcast, please do subscribe and rate and review episodes.
Hashtags:
#overwhelm #procrastination #priorities
Mentioned in this episode:
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336

Why are so many employees burning out sometimes before their careers have even properly begun? In this episode of Psychology, Actually, Dr Marianne Trent is joined once again by educational psychologist Dr Adam McCartney to explore the psychology of workplace wellbeing, burnout, leadership, identity, organisational culture and the growing impact of AI on confidence and autonomy at work.
We discuss how modern workplaces often prioritise productivity and metrics over human wellbeing, why early career professionals are struggling, and how organisational systems can either support or damage psychological safety.
The conversation explores mentorship, identity, communities of practise, whistleblowing, emotional labour, compassion fatigue, autonomy, burnout in healthcare and education, and why people thrive when they feel like they matter.
Timestamps
00:00 Why employees are burning out
01:47 Workplace wellbeing and organisations
04:09 Communities of practise and identity
06:52 Whistleblowing and organisational culture
10:54 Burnout in healthcare roles
13:40 Autonomy, competency and wellbeing
17:09 Why informal support matters
20:39 The pressure of performance metrics
24:39 Learning leadership safely
27:26 Mentorship and onboarding
29:46 Emotional collection and mattering
31:41 Identity, roles and belonging
35:52 Is AI reducing confidence and autonomy?
38:07 Adam’s podcast and final reflections

#PsychologyActually #Burnout #WorkplaceWellbeing
Links:
📲 Connect with Dr Adam McCartney: https://www.instagram.com/dradammcartney/
https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-adam-mccartney-afbpss-647ab1221/
Listen to his Podcast, between 2 Psychs: https://www.dradammccartney.com/betweentwopsychs
🫶 To join my podcast membership to get early access to episodes and / or exclusive weekly content head to: https://the-aspiring-psychologist.captivate.fm/support or to the Apple Podcasts App: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-aspiring-psychologist-podcast/id1605628278 or to YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOwjrIP_jatiqlAivJE2mgQ/join
📚 To check out The Clinical Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3jOplx0
📖 To check out The Aspiring Psychologist Collective Book: https://amzn.to/3CP2N97
💡 To check out or join the aspiring psychologist membership for just £30 per month head to: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/membership
🖥️ Check out my short courses for aspiring psychologists and mental health professionals here: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/online-courses
Ask Marianne your most pressing psychology career question and she will send you a FREE bespoke reply! Grab your free psychology success guide here and fill in the most pressing concern box: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk (scroll to the bottom of the page)
✍️ Get your FREE Supervision Shaping Tool now: https://www.aspiring-psychologist.co.uk/free-resources
📱Connect socially with Marianne and check out ways to work with her, including the Aspiring Psychologist Book, Clinical Psychologist book and The Aspiring Psychologist Membership on her Link tree: https://linktr.ee/drmariannetrent
💬 To join my free Facebook group and discuss your thoughts on this episode and more: https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiringpsychologistcommunity
Like, Comment, Subscribe & get involved:
If you enjoy the podcast, please do subscribe and rate and review episodes.
Mentioned in this episode:
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336
Sponsored by WriteUpp
I've used WriteUpp in my own clinical practice for more than six years and am delighted to partner with them. WriteUpp brings together appointments, records, notes, invoicing and secure messaging in one UK-built, GDPR-compliant platform. Use code MARIANNE30 for a free 30-day trial and 30% off your first 6 months at this link: https://writeupp.com/?refid=142336