Autistic and ADHD Kids Parenting Strategies: Every Brain is Different

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren talk about one of the most common and controversial questions parents ask when raising neurodivergent kids: whether children with ADHD, anxiety, or executive functioning challenges should take medication. They discuss why medication decisions can feel so heavy for parents and emphasize that every brain is different, so what works for one child may not work for another. Samantha and Lauren explain how medication can sometimes help regulate an overwhelmed nervous system and act as a “pattern interrupter,” allowing kids to better learn coping, emotional regulation, and executive functioning skills. 

They also talk honestly about the downsides, including potential side effects and the trial-and-error process of finding the right medication and dosage. Throughout the conversation, they remind parents that medication is not a magic fix and should be viewed as one tool in a larger toolbox that also includes supportive parenting, environmental supports, therapy, and skill-building. Ultimately, the goal is not to tell parents what decision to make, but to help them feel informed and confident as they work with medical professionals to choose what’s best for their child.

 

00:00 Introduction

02:00 Why Parents Ask About Medication and Why One Medication Doesn’t Work for Everyone

03:05 Medication Shame: Why Taking Medication Isn’t the “Easy Way Out”

05:00 Nervous System Overwhelm in Neurodivergent Kids + A Child’s “Quiet Brain” Moment

08:05 Pros of Medication: Nervous System Regulation and Skill Building

09:00 Improved Quality of Life: Focus, Less Anxiety, and Fewer Meltdowns

10:05 Breaking the Shame Cycle from Constant Negative Feedback

12:00 Medication Isn’t Risk-Free: Trial and Error and Possible Side Effects

14:25 Finding the Right Medication and Dosage Can Take Time

16:00 Medication Isn’t a Magic Fix: Kids Still Need Skills and Support

17:05 Medication Raises the Threshold So Kids Can Handle Life

19:00 No Right Answer: Some Kids Benefit from Medication, Some Don’t

20:00 Parenting Confidence: Making Decisions Without Outside Pressure

21:55 Final Thoughts

 

Register for the Summit: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/summit

 

Connect with Samantha Foote!
Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Samantha and Lauren share Samantha’s experience competing for Mrs. Idaho to encourage parents, especially those raising neurodivergent kids, not to feel guilty for doing something for themselves with the right support.

They then discuss choosing “real connection” with a child over society’s idea of “right connection,” emphasizing that behavior improves when children feel connected, safe, and understood, and that a dysregulated nervous system can’t learn or be reasoned with.

They explain how typical expectations like eye contact, loud praise, adult-led conversation, or insisting on “proper” responses can backfire, and encourage observing needs (hunger, tiredness, overstimulation, anxiety, masking) before correcting.

They suggest supporting regulation through reduced demands, co-regulation, sensory-aware environments, predictability, and joining a child’s interests, and invite listeners to a free Parenting the Child You Have online summit on March 13.

 

Register for the Summit: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/summit

Connect with Samantha: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/

 

00:00 Welcome and Hosts

00:07 Samantha’s Pageant Story

00:28 Self-Care Without Guilt

02:20 Pageant Connections and Confidence

03:59 Real Connection vs Right Connection

05:00 Connection Before Correction

06:34 Why Safety Comes First

08:01 When Typical Connection Backfires

10:53 Check Basic Needs First

12:55 Body Clues and Misreads

15:17 Co-Regulation Over Consequences

16:18 Create a Supportive Environment

17:54 Predictability and Shared Interests

19:52 Join Their World in Practice

22:49 Trial and Error Mindset

23:38 Parenting Summit Invitation

24:59 Register and Closing

 

Connect with Samantha Foote!
Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

Samantha and Lauren welcome certified grief educator and coach Suzanne Jabour to the podcast to discuss grief beyond bereavement, particularly the grief parents may feel after a child’s diagnosis. They explore how grieving the loss of an imagined future does not reflect a lack of love for a child, and how acknowledging emotions can help parents more fully accept and support their kids. Suzanne shares her perspective that diagnoses and labels can be embraced as practical tools to access educational and government systems, resources, and advocacy leverage, even when the label may evolve over time; she also describes her own experience advocating for her son Ben’s needs in school and the importance of being emotionally clear when entering challenging meetings like IEPs.
Suzanne offers strategies for moving through ongoing and situational grief, including allowing “hot mess” moments, using a feelings wheel to name nuanced emotions so they can move, finding spaces to be witnessed, and preparing emotionally before difficult conversations to show up empowered. They also discuss the ongoing grief parents feel when neurodivergent children are excluded or mistreated, and Suzanne suggests balancing vigilance with intentionally noticing “glimmers” or micro-joys, small moments of acceptance and safety.
 
00:00 Introduction
00:48 Why This Episode: Grief After a Diagnosis (Not Just Death)
02:40 Grieving the ‘Expected’ Life Helps You Show Up for Your Child
05:21 Accepting the Diagnosis: Using Labels to Access Support
09:47 Staying Open to Possibility While Parenting Differently
11:51 How to Move Through Diagnosis Grief: Name the Feelings
14:16 Advocacy & IEP Meetings: Regulating Emotions to Go ‘Mama Bear’
17:20 Ongoing Daily Grief: When the World Mistreats Your Kid
20:26 Glimmers & Micro-Joys: Balancing the Negativity Bias
22:20 Resources, Where to Find Suzanne, and Final Takeaways
24:12 Fun Question + Hosts’ Highlights, Summit Invite & Wrap-Up
 
Sign up for the Summit: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/summit
Join the Community: https://www.everybrainisdifferent.com/membership
 
Connect with Suzanne!
https://www.suzannejabour.com
http://www.linkedin.com/in/suzanne-jabour
https://www.facebook.com/SuzanneJabour
 

Connect with Samantha Foote!
Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren discuss strategies for parenting neurodivergent children, particularly focusing on issues related to clothing. They share personal anecdotes and emphasize the importance of giving children autonomy over their clothing choices. This can help build their identity, confidence, and ability to navigate the world more successfully.
Samantha and Lauren provide practical tips such as buying multiples of favorite clothing items, prioritizing sensory comfort over aesthetics, and involving kids in the shopping process while managing their overwhelm with choices.
They also advocate for allowing children to wear unconventional outfits as a way to foster self-expression and emotional regulation.
 
00:00 Introduction
00:41 Solidarity for Struggling Parents + A PDA Morning Story
02:12 Clothing Beyond Sensory: Identity, Autonomy & Confidence
04:13 Let Them Choose: Regulation, Confidence & Less People-Pleasing
05:50 When Choices Overwhelm: Shopping Strategies That Work
07:54 Sensory Checklists, Repeat Outfits & Buying Duplicates
09:29 Autonomy & Self-Advocacy: Dress for the Nervous System
11:27 Declutter Without Guilt: Keep What Works, Donate the Rest
13:51 Parent Takeaways: Outfit Routines, Comfort First, Acceptance
17:25 Reflection Questions + Share Wild Outfits + Summit Invite
 
Register for the Summit: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/summit
 

Connect with Samantha Foote!
Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent

In this episode, Samantha and Lauren talk about the patterns of clothing preferences in children with autism and ADHD. They discuss common scenarios where children suddenly favor previously ignored clothes and share insights from an occupational therapist on managing these behaviors.
The conversation encompasses practical strategies from other parents, the importance of sensory safety, and the impact of new clothing on a child's nervous system.
Emphasizing the need for comfort over social expectations, they address the pressures parents face and offer solutions for creating a stress-free clothing environment for neurodivergent children.
 
00:00 Introduction
00:40 Clothing Choices for Neurodivergent Kids
03:14 Strategies for Encouraging Kids to Wear New Clothes
06:10 Understanding Sensory Sensitivities
06:56 Personal Experiences and Reflections
08:30 Balancing Comfort and Social Expectations
17:17 Conclusion and Upcoming Topics
18:19 Invitation to the Summit

Join the Summit! https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
 

Connect with Samantha Foote!
Website: https://everybrainisdifferent.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/everybrainisdifferent
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@everybrainisdifferent